


To the Batcave

by braezenkitty



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alcohol, Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, Drunk Dean, First Kiss, Frottage, Halloween, Halloween Costumes, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Rough Kissing, batman kink, deadpool kink, gratuitous use of costumes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-01
Updated: 2016-10-01
Packaged: 2018-08-18 19:56:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8174063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/braezenkitty/pseuds/braezenkitty
Summary: Cas just wanted to experience Halloween like humans do... he totally didn't have any ulterior motives when he ordered himself a Batman costume.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This uh... turned into something unexpected. It was fun to write though; I hope it's fun to read! Happy Halloween lovelies!

“What the hell are you wearing, Cas?” Dean asked, lowering his beer mid-sip when Cas walked into the kitchen.

“It’s a costume, Dean. Halloween is the day to dress up as whatever you want, isn’t it?” Cas said, walking over to the table where Dean and Sam were having dinner.

“Uh...” Dean said, “yeah, but—”

“I wanted to dress up as The Batman,” Cas said, stopping next to the table and adjusting his mask.

“The Batman... _The_ Batman?” Dean sputtered.

“Yes. I ordered the costume from the internet using one of the credit cards you gave me. I hope that’s okay...” Cas trailed off, pulling at the fake leather pants to adjust them around his thighs. “I’m not sure I got the correct size though, these pants are very tight and um, revealing.”

“Uh, that’s—no, they’re, uh, they fit fine, Cas, but why are you dressed as Batman?”

Sam giggled and shook his head as he stood and collected his plate.

“Well, a costume is required for trick-or-treating, is it not?”

“Oh, man, Cas—” Dean said, running a hand over his face.

“Is that not okay? Did I get something wrong? I got you a costume as well, Dean.”

Sam burst into laughter as he washed his dish in the sink. Dean threw a murderous glance at his back.

“Well, now I’m terrified,” Dean said, guzzling his beer. “Look, Cas, Halloween is a kid thing. Adults don’t go trick-or-treating. And angels who are several millennia old _definitely_ don’t go trick-or-treating.”

“Why not?” Cas asked, furrowing his brow at Dean.

“It’s just not—” Dean broke off with a sigh. “Look, someone opens their door and sees a full grown man dressed as Batman saying ‘trick-or-treat’, they’re gonna tell you to get the fuck off their porch.”

“Oh,” Cas said, “I just thought... I don’t know, I thought it could be fun.”

“It’s okay, Cas,” Sam said, returning from the sink and patting his shoulder. “It’s perfectly acceptable for adults to wear costumes on Halloween, and there are other, more age appropriate things to do. We should go out. I’m sure there’s a costume contest or something going on at one of the bars in town.”

“Go out,” Dean said, “like in public... in costume.”

“I would enjoy that very much,” Cas said, smiling at Dean.

Dean slumped forward with his elbows on the table, dropping his head into his hands. “I am so going to regret this. What costume did you get me?”

 

* * *

 

“Dean, let’s go!” Sam called, rapping his knuckles against Dean’s closed door.

“Just a minute,” Dean called, voice muffled by the door, “I’m having... adjustment... issues.”

“I can help with that, Dean,” Cas said, “I had some trouble with the Batman costume as well.”

“No! Just... no. I’m fine.”

Cas shrugged and looked at Sam, who had a hand clamped over his mouth trying not to laugh. “Dude, you just offered to help him arrange his junk,” he said as quietly as he could. “He’s probably having a total meltdown right now.”

“I don’t understand what the big deal is with humans and their genitals. It’s just another body part.”

“Social conditioning. We all grow up being told it’s bad and wrong to have anything to do with them, and for a man to offer to get anywhere near another man’s genitals is not at all acceptable if one of those men is not secure in his sexuality or masculinity. Or even if he is, it’s still kinda weird.”

“You think Dean is insecure about his sexuality?”

“I can’t really say that, but I do know he’s overcompensating for something.”

“Hmm,” Cas said, but before he could say anything else Dean pulled the door open and stepped out. Cas’ jaw dropped.

“You’re lucky I like Deadpool and have already had several beers,” Dean said, pointing at Cas, “otherwise I would not be leaving the house.”

“You look great, Dean,” Cas said, letting his eyes roam over the form-fitting crimson leather.

“You do look pretty awesome, Dean,” Sam said. “Or should we call you Wade tonight?”

“Yeah, okay, Clark,” Dean said. “How come you get to be the only superhero not wearing skin tight pants?”

“Because Cas didn’t order me a costume, so I had to make do with what I could find around here. I found some old glasses, and I had a superman t-shirt and plenty of suits... so voila.”

“I hate you both,” Dean said, turning to walk to the garage. “I hope those dead guy glasses are cursed.”

“Worth it,” Cas said under his breath, enjoying the view of Dean’s rear end covered in leather as he walked away.

“I heard that, Cas! Let’s get the hell out of here before my buzz wears off and I change my mind,” Dean called over his shoulder. “You’re driving, Sammy.”

 

* * *

 

“Figures Samantha would ditch us for a girl,” Dean grumbled as he and Cas walked across the parking lot.

Cas saw him stumble out of the corner of his eye and held out a hand. “Keys, Dean.”

“What? Fuck off, Cas. You’re not driving my Baby.”

“Dean, give me the keys. Please. You’re in no shape to drive.”

“Yeah, and what if I’d rather pass out in the back seat and sleep until I am ready to drive, huh? Whatcha gonna do about that, _Batman_ , tie me up with one of your handy little belt gadgets and steal them from me?”

“If that’s what it takes.”

“I’d like to see you try,” Dean said with a giggle. “Dude, just let me sleep for a bit and sober up. Unlike Batman, you can actually fly, so flap on back to the Batcave. Me and my Baby’ll be fine here.”

“Dean, I’m not leaving you passed out in the parking lot of a bar.”

“Alright, fine. Do the Batman voice first,” Dean said, unsuccessfully trying to stifle another giggle.

Cas sighed. “What do you mean, the Batman voice?”

“Dude, you got yourself a Batman costume and you don’t even know what the Batman voice is? Search your mental archives or whatever, didn’t Metadouche zap that into your brain with all the pop culture crap?”

“Not exactly. I have the knowledge, but I don’t have the experience of actually hearing or seeing any of the movies.”

“That’s not cool, man, we gotta fix that post haste,” Dean said, leaning against the hood of the Impala, legs splayed in front of him.

“Well, we could go back to _the Batcave_ and fix it if you’d give me the car keys,” Cas said, stopping in front of Dean.

“Nope. Not till you do the Batman voice. And then you gotta use your Batskills to get them from me.”

Cas rolled his eyes and sighed again. “Fine. Are you going to tell me how to do the Batman voice then?”

“Real deep, kinda gravelly,” Dean said, then cleared his throat and sat up straight, “like this. _I’m Batman_.”

“And if I do this voice and use my ‘Batskills’,” Cas said, doing finger quotes, “to get the keys, you’ll let me drive you home?”

“Yeah, sure, I’ll let Baby be the Batmobile for a night,” Dean said, grinning.

Cas cleared his throat and took a couple more steps to stand directly in front of Dean.

“And one more thing,” Dean said, holding up a finger to stop Cas and pulling his mask down to cover his face. “You gotta pretend I’m actually Deadpool and you’re actually Batman, you can’t just say any old phrase and think that’ll work.”

“Alright,” Cas said, clearing his throat again and standing in his best stern Batman stance. “Wade Wilson, give me the keys to the Batmobile. Now,” he growled.

An obvious full body shiver ran through Dean, and Cas smirked, holding out his hand.

“Nope, that was pretty intimidating I gotta admit, but I said you gotta use your _Batskills_ too,” Dean said. Cas didn't need to see his face to know he was smirking right back.

Cas narrowed his eyes as Dean dangled the keys from a finger. He could use a touch of grace to snatch them before Dean even realized what had happened, but the way Dean was egging him on tonight, teasing him with innuendos in the bar all night... well, it made him wonder if Dean was trying to provoke a specific reaction. One his alter-ego Deadpool might try to provoke out of a fellow superhero he was attracted to.

Cas licked his lips and cocked his head, watching Dean and considering what Batman would do in this situation. He’d probably grab Dean and throw him, maybe punch him and knock him out. Cas didn’t want to hurt him, but Dean was obviously angling for the full Batman experience.

He moved closer, kicking Dean’s feet apart and stepping into the space between them. Dean sat up straighter, though he didn’t move away. Cas sensed Dean’s heart rate speeding up as he took another step closer. He was definitely in the ‘personal space’ zone and still, Dean didn’t move away. Cas made a decision.

Taking another slow step, Cas stopped to stand between Dean’s thighs. He didn’t need his grace to hear Dean’s shallow, ragged breathing. He schooled his face, suppressing a smirk and remaining impassive and stern, just like Batman. Then he reached out and grabbed a handful of Dean’s costume, pulling his face close.

“Give me the keys,” he growled.

Dean shivered again, but shook his head. “Nope.”

“Alright,” Cas said, “you brought this upon yourself, _Wade_.”

“You know threats only exc—”

Dean broke off with a squeak as Cas wrapped fingers around his throat and shoved him backwards, pinning him against the hood of the Impala. Cas couldn’t contain his smirk, and he wished he could see the look on Dean’s face.

“Oh, getting rough with me, huh ba—uh, Batman?” Dean gasped. “Think that’ll get you what you want?”

“I should stuff something in that smart mouth of yours.”

“Yeah, you probably should,” Dean said. Cas could tell he was going for Deadpool’s snarky banter, but it came out way too breathless with Dean panting like he was.

And then Cas was hit with a wave of longing so strong it felt like a physical punch to his gut. Dean’s heart was racing. Cas could practically smell the desire wafting off of him. He felt himself hardening in response and he leaned forward, seeking friction instinctually.

Dean gasped and Cas froze when their lower halves came into contact. Dean was very obviously enjoying this just as much as Cas was, and the clinging Deadpool costume did absolutely nothing to conceal it. Cas made another decision.

He kept a hand on Dean’s throat, using a bit of his grace to help keep him pinned to the car. He released his grip on the front of Dean’s costume and reached to pull the Deadpool mask up halfway, just enough to reveal Dean’s mouth.

“Cas,” Dean panted.

Cas stopped thinking and crashed forward, pinning Dean with the full weight of his body as he kissed him. It was rough and wet and Dean tasted of beer and smelled of arousal. He could feel Dean’s desire for him swirling around inside of him, making him feel drunk and reckless. He pressed forward, drawing a moan out of Dean as he ground their hips together.

Dean wrapped his legs around the back of Cas’ thighs, pulling him closer. His arms snaked up and around Cas’ shoulders. Some still functioning part of Cas’ brain realized the keys to the Impala were dangling against his shoulder blade.

As they kissed, he reached up with his free hand and gripped Dean’s forearm, slamming it back down against the hood. The force caused Dean to release his grip on the keys, letting them hang loose in his palm. Cas snatched them with a dark chuckle against Dean’s lips.

“Son of a bitch,” Dean said, letting his head fall back against the hood with a thump. “That’s cheating.”

“You never said distraction wasn’t a Batskill,” Cas said, standing and pulling Dean upright by the hand.

Dean pulled his Deadpool mask the rest of the way off, running a hand through his hair to tame it. He brought his gaze up to meet Cas’ eyes and they watched each other, the air between them crackling with electricity as they caught their breath. Finally, Dean broke the tension with a huffed laugh.

“So uh... that,” Dean said, wagging a finger between them, “was an interesting thing that just happened.”

“Indeed,” Cas said, pulling off his own mask. It left him feeling exposed, but he didn’t want the barrier between them. “Was it a... good thing?”

Dean laughed again, glancing down at his feet then back up. Now that the mask wasn’t covering half his face, Cas could see that his cheeks were flushed a very pretty pink. “Yeah, I think so. Do you?”

“I don’t know,” Cas said, a smile spreading across his face. “Maybe we should try it again, as Dean and Castiel this time. Just to be sure.”

“Yeah, that’s probably a good idea,” Dean said, hooking a finger in the belt of Cas’ costume and tugging gently. “We should uh, keep these costumes though.”

“Ah, so you admit the costumes were a good idea?” Cas said with a smirk.

“Yeah, I guess they were a pretty good idea,” Dean said, smirking back and tugging Cas closer.

Cas let himself be pulled into Dean’s space, close enough to feel Dean’s breath on his lips. He tilted his head up and stopped just before they touched.

“Get in the car, Dean,” he growled in his best Batman voice. “Let’s take this back to the Batcave.”

**Author's Note:**

> Come find me on [tumblr](http://geek-kitty.tumblr.com/).


End file.
